My wife and I are the parents of three sons, who are our pride and joy. When each of them became a teenager, we held a sort of coming of age ceremony to mark their entrance into manhood. As close friends and family looked on, we spoke strength, courage, faith and character into their lives. I can never forget in particular the input of my hero and father, as he imparted wisdom I could only hope to possess one day.
This is of course not a novel idea. From our Judeo-Christian heritage, the bar mitzvah and bat mitzvah are obvious examples. And every Latino culture I'm aware of celebrates a girl's coming of age with the all-important quinceañera, something Americans are more and more familiar with as the Latino population continues to increase. I have never heard of anything similar for Latino boys.
We can learn a great deal from both Native American and many African traditions which involve separating the inductee from the community, left alone to face the challenges of solitude and survival. The separation phase is then followed by a transitional phase in which the child learns certain real life skills. Then and only then is the child accepted into society as an adult.
Not that we are implying in these traditions that adolescence doesn't happen. The young man or woman still must pass through the inevitable season -- longer for some and shorter for others -- of questioning, exploring, and determining exactly who he or she wants to be.
So the question is this: do coming of age traditions help speed the process toward maturity? Or are they outdated practices? Does marking this milestone help the process of taking personal responsibility? Or are those who practice them expecting too much too fast and depriving the boy or girl of an important part of childhood?
What is your experience or perspective? Have you been part of such rituals that greatly impacted your life? Do you know of traditions from other cultures that you find particularly meaningful?
I'm particularly eager to read your comments on this subject. Please take a brief minute to share them here.
This is the 75th edition of the Wayfarer. If you've enjoyed reading anywhere nearly as much as I've enjoyed writing, then it is time well spent.
I'm particularly eager to read your comments on this subject. Please take a brief minute to share them below.